How Heart Failure Impacted My Music - by Priscilla Ariana

I began feeling sick a month after having COVID. I remember being so tired. I did not leave my bed thinking that healing works best when we sleep but grew frustrated as the days went on since I was only growing sicker. My temperature was rising every day up until 105 and wouldn’t go down. I had a sore throat which led us to thinking it was strep but the test came negative, then ran more tests yet they all came out negative. My parents were changing my sheets that I would sweat through so then they started bringing towels and changing them underneath me. I went to the doctor who told me how my potassium level was low and that the reason my temperature wasn’t going down was because I wasn’t allowing my body to fight by taking the Tylenol. Considering this, the doctor insisted that I stop taking Tylenol and instead  allow my body to fight the virus. So, that is what I did.  

The next night after this instruction I remember watching Soul in my mothers bedroom except when the movie had finished I recall asking my mom “what just happened? I was watching the movie but don’t remember anything.” It turns out I wasn't present for the movie at all. My mom was spooked and called my aunt who was a past nurse and she asked how my breathing was. My mom then had me blow into this breathing instrument my eldest brother used in the past and I could barely lift the ball within it. My aunt said “Lisa, bring Priscilla to the ER right now.” Back to the ER my parents and I went although they could only go so far since COVID restrictions were in order.  

I remember laying down in the ER looking up to the ceiling overhearing the doctor say “your heart is at 30%, you have a very low blood pressure, and pneumonia.” I found out later from my mom how the doctors told her, “we will do the best we can.'' which led her to get to the car and start bawling her eyes out while holding my fathers hand. After hearing the news from the doctor I remember drowning out all of the noise in the room. I paused, closed my eyes and had a moment in prayer.  When I began praying  I immediately felt bad because I have not been praying as consistently as usual. 

The thought that followed was that God knew my heart and intention and knew that I was sorry. While in prayer I thought to myself how thankful I was for all that I have lived through unknowing of what the next 10 minutes would consist of. It was a signifying moment where I disattached and surrendered. Before this moment my greatest fear was death. 

After some time spent in the ICU I was finally able to go home. Although, this time I wasn’t the same Priscilla, at all. My dad wheeled me out and then I stood up, walked and remembered feeling the cold air that I was dreaming of while looking out of the hospital room window. Stepping on the curb to the car I remember almost falling, losing my balance, even talking I would have to take pauses. I was very fragile. After arriving home I walked super slowly up the stairs to my bedroom with my dad behind making sure I didn’t fall down.

Immediately my mindset was more alert than ever. Even in the ICU I was still attending Zoom classes. This was such a blessing especially since most of my classes were Songwriting during my senior year so while going through all of this I was transferring all of my emotion into song. 

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I want to thank Priscilla for taking the time to share this story with us. 

Be sure to follow Priscilla on Instagram, and Spotify. And, be sure to listen to "Cherry Blossoms" wherever you usually find your music.

Thanks again Priscilla!